First Rescue Free

Part 5

Lucille grinned at Stupendous Guy. "I like the way you thinned out your hair for the costume. Looks real."

“I’ll take the weapon please,” Stupendous Guy said, palm up.

Evyl Linn fired three times into Stupendous Guy’s chest, but the bullets ricocheted into the walls, narrowly missing a hipster eating a turkey wrap. Stupendous Guy grabbed the gun and crunched it like a beer can to toss over his shoulder. Evyl Linn jumped out of reach and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Stupendous Guy looked confused. “All these years and I had no idea she was a teleporter.” He smiled the trademarked Beaming Smile®, and said, “Good to see you’re back in the neighborhood, old friend.”

“And I’m an innocent man." Adradian shook his way out from behind the table. “I’m rehabbed, a private citizen under your protection. I’m late for my medication, my doctor can verify that. If you’ll excuse me...” Adradian shambled out the back door and across the red brick courtyard.

Newspaper reporters were already arriving for the scoop on Stupendous Guy’s return from the dead. He told the assembled media he’d been trapped in a death-like state by Armageddon's radiation. This trance had evolved Stupendous Guy’s cells to be more powerful and help in his ongoing mission to keep Metro City safe. He announced that both he and Dr. Filth would be returning to the Superhero Gang post haste. People cheered. Everyone was happy, except Bureaucraticus, of course.

That night, when press went home and the other superheroes went to bed, Stupendous Guy asked Dr. Filth to help with first watch. They drank scotch and talked about their adventures. Dr. Filth finally convinced himself to ask the question that had been bothering him all night. “If that radiation story was true, all the Gang would be in trances, or worse.”

“My prolonged exposure...”

“They kept Armageddon’s body in my room for a week before we shot him into space.” Dr. Filth refilled his rocks glass. “Why did you fake your death?”

Stupendous Guy coughed and scratched his nose. “I wanted to retire. Your single Moon may give me great powers, but it has given me long life as well. I’ve already lived two or three times longer than people on my homeworld. I’m tired, Doctor, I don't know how much longer I can be Stupendous Guy. The Superhero Gang was created to replace me. After I fought Armageddon, I needed a vacation, so I took some time off as Gil. That Bureaucraticus really screwed things up, didn’t he? I should probably start running background checks.”

“You didn’t know he was Adradian’s son?”

Stupendous Guy shrugged. “He told me he wanted to work, so I gave him a job. I assume the best in people. Deceit is a facet of humanity I may never understand.”

“You’d think he’d be honored you let him stay in the Gang. I can’t believe they turned my room into a stable.”

“I’ll help you clean it out tomorrow,” Stupendous Guy said, topping off the glass for Dr. Filth. “Bureaucraticus promised to be good," Stupendous Guy said, staring into space. "Neither he or his father committed any crimes. Evyl Linn opened fire and disappeared awful fast though. I'm sure we’ll hear from her soon. Until that changes, I’ll give them the doubt. If you’re born a hero, you’ll die a hero. If that doesn’t convince you to do the right thing, I can’t imagine anything that will.” Stupendous Guy finished his Scotch and poured more.

END