Housing Crisis, My Balls
Now, the Nuge has been hearing a lot about this 'housing crisis' and 'recession' and 'oil prices'. I know y'all are feeling the crunch, but, no surprise, the Nuge here's got a solution. Get this.
Set fire to your money.
Woah, now! I can hear y'all yelping like a boar that's been stuck through the haunch with a graphite and steel arrow. "Nuge, what the glory of God's green earth are you talking about? Burn my cash? You've gone loco en la cabeza." Well, my Mexican speaking friend, hear me out. It'll all make sense in 'un momento'.
Those irresponsible idiots down in D.C. came up with this genius plan to pay for the war they won't fight and to shore up the cheatin' banks that they wouldn't put their own money in. That plan is to print tons of money, just mounds of it, Lincolns, Jackson, Franklins, Grants, McKinleys, Arthurs... You name the president, their pumpin' out his portrait on green paper like it was goin' out of style. They throw this devalued cash at problems and we suffer 'cus of it.
So we regular folk've got to fight back. All this new money is so dang worthless, it's gotten so bad that I when I do some bear huntin' north of the border, I have to bring my own sammiches. I can't be spendin' no 5 dollars for some baloney and cheese on white bread! And neither can you!
We've got to weed out the weak dollars so the strong ones can survive and thrive. It's basic huntin' theory. So get your wallet or purse out and burn them sonbitches, then replace it at the bank. If they ask where it went, just say, 'The Nuge told me to burn it, and now you give me more! And if you don't, you just wait 'til he's in charge!' I'll back up all you burners out there.
Do America a favor! Burn your money!
NUGE 2008
Written by Brett Tribe
No comments:
Post a Comment