No Right to Life Party
I got home from taking care of a little "bear problem" that's been plaguing the ranch, and I heard some story about fetus's feeling pain after a couple months or something like that. That's got to be the biggest load of horse piles I've ever heard. I mean, think about it, if 9 months worth of cells is a person, and 2 months worth of cells is a person, then one cell is a person, and probably can feel some kind of pain on some level.
Now, Nuge doesn't want to go stepping on anyone's rights. Personally, I don't agree with that kind of birth control, but I'd certainly rather pay for ten minutes of vacuuming than 18 years of child-rearing. Nuge believes in Americans making decisions for themselves, and there are plenty more hot-button issues the Nuge is itching to push. Rest assured that Nuge is pro-choice on all subjects.
I guess, what Ole' Nuge is saying, is that I'm proud to announce a political party of my own, the "No Right to Life Party." Once a little brat gets squirted out, it's up to that 9 months worth of cells to prove its own worth. It doesn't have any 'right to life.’ That child could die at any time from any kind of inherent illness, disease, bacteria, pollution, poison, neglect, or even a wild animal attack in the Australian outback. Hell, for all Sweaty Teddy knows, it could happen in an Outback Steakhouse. Who is going to press charges against that Dingo?
We don't have any right to life, it takes hard work and perseverance. You have to survive because you want to survive. That's the law of the jungle, and that's what the No Right to Life party stands for. Sticking up for yourself and accepting the consequences of your actions. That's what being American is all about, thinking for ourselves and making our own decision about what's right and wrong. Remember that when you step into that little metal box next November.
Vote Nuge 2008
Also, I'd like to see those "Nuge 2008" posters start selling a little faster, if you could.
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